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August 1, 2009
2.4 MB
1944×2896
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Comments: 6
Favourites: 15 [who?]


Views: 2,708 (0 today)

Camera Data

NIKON CORPORATION
NIKON D80
10/1000 second
F/5.6
135 mm
100
Jul 31, 2009, 10:22:19 AM
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:iconsilvietepes:

Photographer: me.
Model: my friend Lara ( [link] )
Place: Forlì's monumental cemetery.
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:iconsuzi9mm:
Critique by `suzi9mm Aug 1, 2009, 6:33:13 AM
i appreciate the gothic portrait direction that i think you're going to. the model has potential too, i think you caught an interesting look on her.

in the description, you mention where this was shot (cemetery), however it is not shown in the photo in any way. perhaps you would like to include something 'cemeterish' in the bg...?

the umbrella is a nice touch, u could try play with it, give it more attention in some way.

the model is positioned top center, not very interestingly in other words. i think you could get much more out of this if you have her more to the left or right, then include some background, or umbrella/hair/dress. the dress is probably nicely gothic, but we cannot see much of it now!
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:iconcrazy-eyes:
~crazy-eyes Aug 5, 2009
I don't have a problem with the composition as such. Because of the fall of her hair, it's a strongly triangular composition, which is legit in its own right. And the diagonal introduced by the umbrella is another good device. Maybe a greater angle on the umbrella would have worked better, or pushing the hands towards the lens would have added depth. It's funny, I can always see improvements in a final print but never through the viewfinder!
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:iconsilvietepes:
*SilvieTepes Aug 6, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
What do you mean with this "I can always see improvements in a final print but never through the viewfinder!" sentence? ^^;
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:iconcrazy-eyes:
~crazy-eyes Aug 8, 2009
Oh, it's just this weird thing I've noticed lately with my photos - At the time I take any photo I'm obviously happy enough with the composition, lighting and so on... but once I've downloaded it and looked at it critically I can always seem to find something that I'd do differently if I was to take the same shot again. Gets pretty frustrating after a while. BTW, I just had another look at your image and noticed how good the exposure is in what looks to be really contrasty lighting.
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:iconsilvietepes:
*SilvieTepes Aug 8, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
Concerning my photo, thanks! It means a lot to me! :)

About the explanation, it happens to me sometimes too. ^^;
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:iconnothing-in-blood:
~nothing-in-blood Aug 2, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
i would love to give a formal critique for this, but i cant. but i will however, give u my reaction.

the model is beautiful. the red hair really brings out he cool color of her face. the umbrella was a nice touch and the lighting is very nice.

her makeup bothers me slightly. the weight of the lipstick is too heavy to her face. if she had fuller eyebrows, i think it would have worked better. (FYI, I'm not a makeup artist, so i could be wrong) may i suggest that if u work with her again (which your friends, so i imagine you will) trying a deep shade of red, or a faded black lipstick instead? the color of the the lipstick shouldn't be more dramatic then the eyes, which are wonderfully deep.

the picture itself makes me want to back up and see the whole thing. my first reaction is wanting to know what the rest of her looked like, what colors she was wearing, and wear this was taken. as stated in the critic by suzi9mm, try to use the cemetery in the background more. it gives a little too much info for the head shot and not enough for a torso or body shot.

hope this was helpful. I'm not a professional or anything just giving my input.
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:iconsilvietepes:
*SilvieTepes Aug 2, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
Mh.. faded black lipstick it's really hard, just because it's hard to find black lipstick itself, so you can imagine. ^^;

Anyway we'll try other shots, so we'll see what we can combine. ;)

About the background and so on, this was just a close up of her, I took other pics with the full body / background seen. :)
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